if you only use this bathroom to shit in private don’t use this bathroom


Dear members of the Tufts community,

About a month ago, we left a little note for you in the Campus Center gender-neutral bathroom. We know you saw it, but just for a little refresher, it said: “If you only use this bathroom to shit in private, don’t use this bathroom.” In response to this, one of you wrote “college boy gotta nut.” It was painted over, so we wrote it again. Sadly, it was painted over again. And even still, it seems like you just didn’t get the message. So we’re gonna spell it out for you.

Gender-neutral bathrooms exist for a specific reason and purpose, and that purpose is certainly not for cisgender people who get stage fright trying to poop. And they are especially not for “college boys” who “gotta nut” (as one of you wrote to us on the wall). When Tufts built this bathroom, it was after years of organizing and serious pressure from the trans and non-binary community on this campus. And even still, after nearly a decade, we only have one (1) stall.

We had to fight so hard for this little bathroom.

This bathroom was built after numerous students wrote petitions and met with administrators again and again after continuously being told that what they were asking for wasn’t possible. We were told that Tufts “can’t afford the construction.” News flash: the SMFA campus has multi-stall gender-neutral bathrooms that required no monetary investment, and they didn’t even need to take out the urinals. News flash: Tufts had the money to pay Tony Monaco $1,126,248 in 2016, but didn’t have the money for… a bathroom?

The gender-neutral bathroom in the campus center was built last year. And yes, the sign says “Any person of any gender identity can use this bathroom,” but please remember that this is the only toilet that most trans and non-binary students can use in the whole building. Meanwhile, there are over a dozen toilets in the campus center for cis people to use, including multi-stall women’s and men’s bathrooms on both floors of the CC. The men’s and women’s rooms are only feet away from our gender-neutral stall. Other bathrooms that we can use, though, are much further away.

Some of us used to walk all the way home or to Tisch (and we know you all use those gender-neutral bathrooms too) every time we had to pee. Either that, or we would go into the gendered bathrooms that made us sick to our stomachs to enter. And now we have to wait—-sometimes up to 20 minutes—-for students and staff, who have never once considered this reality, to finish pooping in private.

Imagine being late for class, missing a meeting, pacing around the campus center trying not to piss your pants, etc. all because you needed to use the bathroom. Imagine, then, having to beg the administration for years to do that. What you all seem to be failing to understand is that every time you use this space, you’re actually adding another hurdle to the obstacle course that is trying to pee while trans.

The moral of the story is that we only have one toilet. Please just let us have this one toilet.

Also, like, what are you even doing in there for so long? Here are some of our guesses.

  • Googling what “gender-neutral” means?
  • Flexing in the mirror?
  • Filling your gallon water jug?
  • Watching the big game? (we’ve heard it on your phones through the wall while waiting for you to leave)
  • Taking 20 minutes to poop? If it’s this one, boys, we’re worried for your intestinal  health. Please eat some fiber. Try Pure for Men™. To put it in terms that your toxic masculinity will understand––we highly doubt it takes you this long to “nut,” so we have to assume you’re just backed up. 

Maybe if you went to class instead of masturbating in the campus center you’d be smart enough to understand why you shouldn’t be doing this. Okay, maybe we’re harping on the whole masturbation thing, but you were the ones who wrote that you “gotta nut” on the bathroom wall. Did you really think we weren’t gonna say anything?

Well, we’ve said the things we wanted to say. But we’re worried you might just still not get it. So let’s review. 

Who is this bathroom not for?

  • The OCL staff
  • Cis athlete boys who don’t want to poop next to other boys :(
  • Cis gays (yes, you too)
  • Touring parents
  • Literally anyone who can use any of the other FOUR multi-stall gendered bathrooms in the campus center

Who is this bathroom for?

– The trans and non-binary people who fought for it, and who literally don’t have anywhere else to pee

To be clear, we know that the lines around gender identity are not so clear cut, and the last thing we want to do is to alienate people who don’t feel comfortable in gendered bathrooms or who just don’t know. We know it’s not you all that are misusing this space. It is, however, extremely obvious that this bathroom is being overused by cis people who just like it better—who want the privacy that, frankly, they don’t actually need. 

Basically, the litmus test is this:

If you only use this bathroom to shit in private, don’t use this bathroom. <3



5 thoughts on “if you only use this bathroom to shit in private don’t use this bathroom

  1. One person writes the “gotta nut” thing and you say “you were the ones who” just creating sides between people. This isn’t a war with the “non binary” and “cis” people we are all just people. Let me make myself clear. I will NEVER stop shitting in the gender neutral bathroom. This post just makes me want to do it even more. I might even intentionally piss on the seat just for giggles. I also will now start masturbating in there on occasion and also watch sports with my volume up. Thanks for your complaints about something sooo important while there are millions of starving children in Yemen. Yemen is just one of many examples I can think of to maybe put your bathroom concerns on the scale of comparison.

  2. Hi my name is Lexi! And i just wanted to say hello to everyone of ALL genders reading this. I am a trans feminine non-binary female and Tufts Alumni Class of 2014. I just bought a house with my parents at 37 Raymond Ave. Somerville so i am back in the community again! <3 I am a big believer in harnessing the power of all emotions and actions both good and evil. My lawyer says i have to obey the law and i do. But i can still harness your hate and violence in creative ways and feast off of your dark energy! So if anyone would like to drop by and ring my doorbell and say hello please do! You know where i live! <3 And if you are cis with a fetish and "gotta nut" i won't let you nut in my house but you can CUM over and see my 3ft Moby Dick Dildo which i bought from extreme restrains dot com. Yes it is in my living room. I hope it inspires MANY of your future fantasies. Also i am still looking for my cousin Wyatt Langmore. I would like to locate his body so if anyone has any information about this please also drop by, ring the doorbell, say hello, and give it your best shot!!!!!!

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